Pictures. It seems has an emotion when it comes to having them taken. It’s our way of documenting the world around us and attempting to remember something that brought us joy. This morning my son wanted me to carry him around the house, as he pointed out what he saw in each picture. His excitement was palpable.
So many times I see posts of people who have lost weight, with a then and now photo side by side. They talk about the person then as being sad, unhealthy, basically a lesser person, where the person now has confidence, strength, and health.
I have always been a healthy person. I haven’t made the greatest food choices, and obviously obesity is a health issue, however, other than my weight, everything has been pretty perfect. When I was heavier, I was just that. Sure, my weight was always there, something either in the back or front of my mind at most times, but it didn’t keep me from living my life or traveling to see the world.
As someone who has yo-yoed in weight so much of my life, it would be easy to only look at and share the “thinner” pictures and delete the “fat” ones. The problem is that I only have been around this weight twice ever in my life, the first time when I was maybe 12 years old, and the other was a little less than 4 years ago when I got pregnant with Elliot. Some of my best memories were made when I weighed 100 pounds more than I do now, including a good chunk of college. I weighed a little more than 30 pounds more than this when I got married, 70 pounds more when I did my senior recital…you get the idea.
Obviously, I didn’t love weighing 140 pounds more than I do now, or else I wouldn’t have had the surgery. However, that didn’t mean I didn’t love my life. Before my surgery, I had just moved back home for the first time in over 10 years when I thought I would never get to do so. I’d secured an amazing job doing what I love, and I was able to live close to family.
We need to find peace within ourselves as we are. Everyone is beautiful in his or her own way, and I think that gets masked in our perception of what we are supposed to look like based on Hollywood, our friends, and society in general.
Last night, I took this picture with my sister. We had just completed one of our first workouts together. We did not get along growing up for a variety of reasons, but time and distance has brought us closer together. She’s always been the thin, fit and active one, and fitness has always been a chore for me. When I told her I might want to share it on my blog, she didn’t now how she felt about it, but I ultimately pulled her around (I think??). 🙂
Having our pictures taken is not about being perfect, flawless, showing our most amazing self. It’s about capturing the moment. Looking back at that picture, I will smile knowing that we had just completed a brutal leg workout, even though we were both sleep deprived and I was crazy sore.
Let’s stop trying to be perfect and instead try to be real. Maybe only then we can start changing what society things is beautiful.
A Work in Progress 